I caught myself looking through pictures I was tagged in the other day criticising myself. I always make it a point to tell myself off when I do this because I know it’s not healthy. What I was focusing on this time was my lips. I knew why I was doing it. I’d been binging on social media all day and it seemed like every woman had these ginormous lips. Going from looking at those to my face seemed like a massive jump. I feel shame writing this but I actually thought for a second about getting my lips plumped out one day. How silly!
I’m white, I’m British and I don’t have a whole lot of diversity immediately in my family tree. I have a narrow nose, I’m pale as fuq and my lips are thinnnnnn! That’s just me – and a bunch of other people. So why do I always seem to crave the opposite? I used to hate my nose, I don’t really know why now… It’s small, it’s not got anything too crazy going on with it. For some irrational reason I’d just developed this hatred of it. When I was younger I wanted brown skin. I thought it was beautiful, warm and looked good in every colour. Now, I’ve been turning my judging eye on my lips. I basically just want to look Jamaican!
I’ve wizened to these negative thoughts about myself over the years. I’ve spent more time appreciating the face and body that I have. I’ve grown to feel thankful for my nose, love the contrast between my skin and my hair, as for me and my lips, we’re going to be just fine. Actually, I’m pretty sure one day I’m going to be thankful they’re thin because my face will look like my own.
There seems to be this one face that everyone is striving for and I can sum it up for you. It has tanned skin, big eyes, big lips, a small nose and thick threaded eyebrows. It’s basically Kylie Jenner’s new face. Everyone seems to be inching closer to this one homogeneous look and it’s scary! I find it really disturbing that all this natural uniqueness we all have is being blended into this fashion face. Every trend has its day, it’s like Newton’s third law of motion – you know the one ‘what comes up must come down’. This trend is going to peak and when it does there will be girls all over the place stuck with giant lips, that don’t match the rest of their face.
Facial features can all be different but for me I think it comes back to a question of ethnicity and identity. Why wouldn’t I want to look like me?